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Overt vs Covert Narcissists

There are two types of narcissists- the Overt Narcissist and the Covert Narcissist.  This chart below compares the two so you can see the differences in their behaviors.
 


The Overt Narcissist

The Covert Narcissist

Self-perceptions and behaviors

  • Extremely selfish
  • Entitled
  • Belief that they are special
  • Grandiose behavior
  • Highly sensitive to criticism
  • Preoccupied with appearances
  • Must be the center of attention at all times
  • Easily bored, especially if the situation or topic does not  involve them
  • Projection (accuse others of the bad behavior that they display)
  • Can turn any situation or conversation back to them
  • Fails to see children as separate individuals
  • Extremely selfish
  • Appears fragile and vulnerable
  • Full of self-doubts
  • Extreme sensitivity to criticism
  • Superficial interests
  • Easily bored, especially if the situation or topic does not involve them
  • Gives the appearance of naïveté, but is not naive
  • Inhibited
  • Can turn any situation or conversation back to them
  • Fails to see children as separate individuals

Behavior in relationships

  • No empathy
  • Few long lasting friendships
  • Value children over spouse
  • High need for praise from those in relationship with them
  • Very envious of others’ talents, financial status, looks, etc.
  • No respect for others’ time or boundaries
  • Frequently interrupt when others are talking
  • Little to no interest in you, unless the information you share can be used against you
  • No empathy
  • Extremely envious of others’ talents, financial status, looks, etc.
  • Lack of ability to trust others
  • No respect for others’ time or boundaries
  • Little to no interest in you, unless the information you share can be used against you

Behavior in romantic relationships

  • Cold
  • Selfish
  • Expect to be taken care of and catered to
  • In charge of the relationship
  • Either very uninhibited and  bossy or very submissive lover
  • Expects to be taken care of and catered to
  • Puts most responsibility on  the spouse (finances, big choices like buying a car or house, etc)
  • If partner is abusive, expects the child(ren) to protect him/her from the abusive partner

Beliefs, ideals, morals

  • Very opinionated
  • Articulate
  • Often loves languages
  • Has no problem lying and will become enraged if you catch them in a lie
  • Can turn any abusive thing they have done  around so the victim looks like the abuser and they look innocent
  • Knowledge is often only what is on the news often or headlining newspapers
  • Forgetful of details
  • Can turn any abusive thing they have done  around so the victim looks like the abuser and they look innocent

How they think

  • Feigned modesty
  • Love of money
  • Often have double standards
  • Liars
  • Selective memory (forgetting things they do not want to remember, such as things that make them look less than perfect)
  • Will adapt their values and opinions if they believe it will gain them favor with someone
  • Double standards
  • Selective memory (forgetting things they do not want to remember, such as things that make them look less than perfect)

 
 




 
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