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The Physically Abusive Mother

If you are an adult woman whose mother still hits her, you are not alone.  You probably feel as if you are, but you really are not.  Many women are too embarrassed that they are grown women, often with children of their own, and still being slapped around as they were when they were children.  Please do not be embarrassed, though!  You are not the one doing bad things that should be a cause for shame- your mother is!  She is the one acting foolishly and cruelly- not you!  There is nothing that can justify her behavior!

Also, if you were raised in the church, or with very religious parents, you most likely heard "Spare the rod, spoil the child" as a justification for physical abuse.  This is not what God intended with that verse!  God is a loving God- He wants what is best for you, and being beaten is NOT best!  He wants parents to discipline their children so they are not spoiled, but discipline does not need to mean cause physical harm!  Other verses that prove this are:

Colossians 3:21 "Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged."

Ephesians 6:4 "And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord."

1 Thessalonians 2:11 "As ye know how we exhorted and comforted and charged every one of you, as a father doth his children,"

Nothing that your mother can say or do can justify hitting you.  Period.  Protect yourself from her blows.  You are the only one who can do so, and you have every right to do so!

On the road to recovery, I personally found my relationship with God to be my greatest help.  He helped me to heal, and to learn ways to deal with my dysfunctional mother.  Prayer and meditating on His word, the Bible, helped so much.  Learning who the Bible says I am as a child of God is not only inspiring and comforting, but helpful in the healing process.  If you do not have a personal relationship with God, please read the page Salvation Through Jesus Christ for more information.


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