Overt vs Covert Narcissists |

There are two types of narcissists- the Overt Narcissist and the Covert Narcissist. This chart below compares the two so you can see the differences in their behaviors.

	The Overt Narcissist	The Covert Narcissist
Self-perceptions and behaviors	Extremely selfish Entitled Belief that they are special Grandiose behavior Highly sensitive to criticism Preoccupied with appearances Must be the center of attention at all times Easily bored, especially if the situation or topic does not involve them Projection (accuse others of the bad behavior that they display) Can turn any situation or conversation back to them Fails to see children as separate individuals	Extremely selfish Appears fragile and vulnerable Full of self-doubts Extreme sensitivity to criticism Superficial interests Easily bored, especially if the situation or topic does not involve them Gives the appearance of naivete, but is not naive Inhibited Can turn any situation or conversation back to them Fails to see children as separate individuals
Behavior in relationships	No empathy Few long lasting friendships Value children over spouse High need for praise from those in relationship with them Very envious of others’ talents, financial status, looks, etc. No respect for others’ time or boundaries Frequently interrupt when others are talking Little to no interest in you, unless the information you share can be used against you	No empathy Extremely envious of others’ talents, financial status, looks, etc. Lack of ability to trust others No respect for others’ time or boundaries Little to no interest in you, unless the information you share can be used against you
Behavior in romantic relationships	Cold Selfish Expect to be taken care of and catered to In charge of the relationship Either very uninhibited and bossy or very submissive lover	Expects to be taken care of and catered to Puts most responsibility on the spouse (finances, big choices like buying a car or house, etc) If partner is abusive, expects the child(ren) to protect him/her from the abusive partner
Beliefs, ideals, morals	Very opinionated Articulate Often loves languages Has no problem lying and will become enraged if you catch them in a lie Can turn any abusive thing they have done around so the victim looks like the abuser and they look innocent	Knowledge is often only what is on the news often or headlining newspapers Forgetful of details Can turn any abusive thing they have done around so the victim looks like the abuser and they look innocent
How they think	Feigned modesty Love of money Often have double standards Liars Selective memory (forgetting things they do not want to remember, such as things that make them look less than perfect)	Will adapt their values and opinions if they believe it will gain them favor with someone Double standards Selective memory (forgetting things they do not want to remember, such as things that make them look less than perfect)

If you end the relationship with the narcissist in your life, it isn’t going to be easy for you. You will feel conflicting emotions such as wondering if you made a mistake yet also glad to be away from this person. You also will experience a profound grief, especially if the narcissist was your parent. There is information on grief at this link: Grief

In addition to the emotional roller coaster ride, the narcissist may turn up the abuse. Check out this page for more information. The Narcissist’s Arsenal